HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY MOM!
so we planned this like at the beginning of this week that we were going to celebrate my mom's birthday by going to philly to a nice restaurant. OF COURSE, the plans fell through. i knew this would happen. saw it coming. why can't my family just pretend they get along with each other for once? i'm sooo sick of all the bullshit that goes on. UGHHH i feel like running away sometimes..
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So today was not a good day. woke up late first of all at 7:31 when i had to arrive at school at 7:45 the latest. FML. i know. so that just ruined my day. then the test took foreverrr. i had the biggest headache ever :/ THEN, i decided maybe i can burn some stress off and went to the gym. that was a bad bad bad idea. i got on the machine for about 4 minuites and i started to get crampy. fuck you again period. so i decided to go home. i call my dad at 2:19 asking him to come pick me up and he told me he'd be there after his delivery. so i waited. and waited....and waited. i waited for an hour and 2 minuites and then i got really mad and called him. guess what he said? he said he "forgot". COOOL DAD. realll cool. this isn't the first time he's "forgotten". it's never happens to my sisters just me. because i know deep down i'm his least favorite and that's a WHOLE different story. So after i got picked up around 3:30, i went straight to bed and just layed there for about a good hour just thinking about things. i had to skip my chior benefit concert because i was NOT in the mood for singing at all. i had work at 5 and i really did not want to go. but, of course i "have" to. its basically my life and i hate it with passion. but i "have" to. work was really slow so i left around 9ish for a wegmans run with some friends. being with them is pretty much what brightens my day. i feel just happier seeing them. so i come home around 10:15 and they tell me that we're not going out to dinner anymore. i didn't even ask why because i knew it was probably a bunch of bullshit like it always is. i really hate my life...i need a change. like for real. i really want to tell someone about things that i keep inside...but it's so hard. i'm so use to keeping everything to myself. i'm basically just scared...scared that they won't understand me and i'd just end up adding more problems to my life. BLAHHH. music is the one thing i always turn to and i guess it's all i need...
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Friday, June 4, 2010
stress stress stress
hi yallll.
so i kind of figured out why i've been in a bad mood lately. PMS. HATEEE IT! ugh. so today sucked for me. Went into school late because i fell asleep on my couch while waiting to actually go to school...yeah i was THAT tired. School was really boring. pretty much did nothing for every class. then i went home and just layed around for a little. I was not feeling good at all. i had to work tonight and of course, work would be SO slow. I felt like dying and it took forever for time to pass. But anyway, thank god i got out 2 hours early. So, tomorow is going to be a busy busy day. I have to take the SAT's at 8 in the morning till 12. Then im going to the ymca to workout. I NEED TO RELEASE ENDORPHINS! After that, i have the Benefit Concert at school from 2-5, and then working from 5:30-10, AND it's my mom's 40th birthday tomorow so we're going out all the way to philly for a really nice dinner. I might just pass out tomorow. There is sooo much going on. UGH UGH UGH. i really need a break. A day where i just dont have to do ANYTHING and lay in bed all day.
Right about now, i feel like my head is about to explode. :(
Well, im gonna get ready for bed. i know im NOT ready for this SAT at alllllll! ughhh wish me luck.
so i kind of figured out why i've been in a bad mood lately. PMS. HATEEE IT! ugh. so today sucked for me. Went into school late because i fell asleep on my couch while waiting to actually go to school...yeah i was THAT tired. School was really boring. pretty much did nothing for every class. then i went home and just layed around for a little. I was not feeling good at all. i had to work tonight and of course, work would be SO slow. I felt like dying and it took forever for time to pass. But anyway, thank god i got out 2 hours early. So, tomorow is going to be a busy busy day. I have to take the SAT's at 8 in the morning till 12. Then im going to the ymca to workout. I NEED TO RELEASE ENDORPHINS! After that, i have the Benefit Concert at school from 2-5, and then working from 5:30-10, AND it's my mom's 40th birthday tomorow so we're going out all the way to philly for a really nice dinner. I might just pass out tomorow. There is sooo much going on. UGH UGH UGH. i really need a break. A day where i just dont have to do ANYTHING and lay in bed all day.
Right about now, i feel like my head is about to explode. :(
Well, im gonna get ready for bed. i know im NOT ready for this SAT at alllllll! ughhh wish me luck.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
every moment last forever when you feel you've lost your way
hiii.
So today has been a pretty good day so far. I dissected a frog in biology class! Pretty cool stuffles. Anyway, i am SO tired though. I feel like time is running out for some reason...there is so much going on. Going to play soccer with some friends soon and then going home after that, getting ready for a chior banquet, and then a senior project group meeting afterwards. I feel like i've been dead lately...maybe not getting enough sleep? i really dont know. Its so hard for me to fall asleep at night now...WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
So today has been a pretty good day so far. I dissected a frog in biology class! Pretty cool stuffles. Anyway, i am SO tired though. I feel like time is running out for some reason...there is so much going on. Going to play soccer with some friends soon and then going home after that, getting ready for a chior banquet, and then a senior project group meeting afterwards. I feel like i've been dead lately...maybe not getting enough sleep? i really dont know. Its so hard for me to fall asleep at night now...WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
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